One of my deepest desires is a very common, human one. We long to be known, to be understood, and in that knowing, to be loved. My parents are amazing and wonderful. They gave to me so much and helped to mold me into the woman I am. Above all, they taught me about Jesus and I am eternally grateful. I remember though, feeling in my teen years that they didn’t know me. It was a place of deep hurt and frustration. Add to that the fact that we moved more than twenty-five times before I left home at eighteen. I felt dragged all over the country leaving behind a string of broken relationships. I believed that no one really knew me. And if they did, I would definitely not be loved.

How overwhelmed I was when I first stumbled across Psalm 139, seemingly by accident.

“O Lord You have examined my heart and know everything about me…You watched me as I was being formed in utter seclusion, as I was woven together in the dark of the womb. You saw me before I was born. Every day of my life was recorded in Your book. Every moment was laid out before a single day had passed.” (Psalm 139:1, 15-16)

Nothing in my life (including finding this chapter!) happened by accident or without divine design. It was like an explosion of light went off in my mind and heart.

I wonder if that was how the woman at the well (John 4) felt when she met Jesus? He told her everything that she had ever done, and still looked at her with such intense love in His eyes.

Jesus waited there at the well for her to come because He knew she would. She had never met anyone like Him. Neither had I. Jesus waits at the well for me too. Patiently. He knows exactly when I will come and exactly what I need before I ask Him. (He knows, but still loves it so much when I ask Him.) He knows me. He has whatever I need in the moment and He has everything I will ever need. Most of the time, what I need is just to be with Him, to hear His voice and see the love in His eyes. I need Him. I long for Him.

He knows everything I have ever done or thought or said and He still loves me. He loves who I am. Not only that, but He LIKES me!?! Yes!! The most thrilling part is that He longs for me WAY more than I can ever long for Him. He loves to be with me. He longs for me. Passionately.

How amazing. How wonderful. How healing is that truth? Even on the days that I run from Him, when I try to hide. He finds me. He knows right where I am and He waits for me to come back to Him, bleeding from my self-inflicted wounds. He heals me and loves on me. He fills me with joy and purpose again. Not because of what I have done, but because of who He is. It is His nature to love. He cannot be anything else but loving.

I am fully known. I am fully loved.
Beloved, so are you.